We Affect Each Other
I had asked Craig and Leslie to walk me through their typical fight. Without blinking, Leslie began explaining that she and Craig don’t share the same priorities. She stated that she does the brunt of the housework, things like emptying the dishwasher, cleaning, and laundry. Craig sat quietly, staring off until Leslie stated that he makes her feel disrespected and unimportant. At the mention of her feelings, Craig came alive. He turned and coldly stated, “I cannot affect the way you feel.” Psychologist Fritz Perls popularized the idea that “no one has or ever will make you feel anything.” This concept has been challenged by Attachment Theory, which...